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Do you ever go to church?

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On what occasions are you prepared to set foot in a church? (Apart from as a tourist!)

Wouldn't set foot in one
17
10%
Would attend only for a ceremony (specify below)
71
43%
Would attend for a ceremony, memorial service or a carol service.
49
30%
Would attend a normal service.
29
17%
 
Total votes: 166

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Maria Mac
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#181 Post by Maria Mac » May 28th, 2009, 12:39 am

Latest post of the previous page:

My dear uncle died today, well yesterday now, just noticed the time. There is no question, I have to go to the church funeral. I sort of want to go but know that it will be dreadful. I had already decided that I would light a candle for my uncle but won't be kissing any icons or crossing myself. Now I've just remembered something else about Greek funerals, which is lining up and kissing the priest's hand near the end of the ceremony. I don't know what I'll do. It might sound absurd to be even considering it but I can imagine that emotion might well get in the way of principle and I'll end up doing what the rest of my family do because it feels right at the time. It'll be the first Greek funeral I've been to in over thirty years.

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Hestia
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#182 Post by Hestia » June 9th, 2009, 4:50 am

I'm a hospice social worker, and part of my job requirement is to make an honest effort to attend the funeral/memorial services of clients who have died on our service. I attend the service, but I don't participate in prayers or communion, and very rarely in hymns. I'm polite, but just keep a very low profile. When the preaching/conversion talk starts, I keep reminding myself that I am there to be a comfort to the family whatever their spiritual background may be and that it really has nothing to do with me at all.

Hestia

lewist
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#183 Post by lewist » June 9th, 2009, 7:39 am

That sounds like a positive professional attitude, Hestia. It's part of your job. There has been a lot of discussion about this but my view is that if there is a funeral for a friend or a member of my family I don't let my humanist views get in the way. After all, lots of xtian friends attended my wife's Humanist funeral last year. It's about respect and support.
Carpe diem. Savour every moment.

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Alan H
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#184 Post by Alan H » June 9th, 2009, 11:28 am

Spot on, Lewist.

I've attended two funerals in the last month. One (have I said this already???) was done by the funeral director and was a mish-mash of spiritual nonsense: "let us pray", then no mention of god or Jesus, just wishy-washy stuff about meeting up with long-lost relatives and it being a better place. It must have been the 'amen' at the end that made it a prayer! I found it trite and unsatisfying.
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Maria Mac
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#185 Post by Maria Mac » June 9th, 2009, 3:38 pm

My uncle's funeral was as awful as expected. Strangely, when it first started I enjoyed the sound of the male voice choir singing and in the opulent environment of St Sophia's cathedral it feel sort of 'spiritual' and appropriate. But ten minutes of that would have been quite enough. Standing for the best part of an hour listening to mumbo jumbo in Greek was difficult to bear. Alan said something about it being a piece of theatre and I understood what he meant.

I lit a candle but didn't kiss any ikons. I didn't kiss the priest or even shake his hand though if I'd been sitting in the front row it would have been harder to avoid.

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Alan H
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#186 Post by Alan H » June 9th, 2009, 3:48 pm

At least Maria understood what the priest was saying! Not knowing what to expect, I stood up with everyone else and had expected to sit down again a few minutes later. An hour later (or was it two?)...

The singers were mostly hidden behind some kind of alter; the priest occasionally disappeared behind a huge elaborate carved wooden partition, returning with some new incense or new book to sing from. It certainly was theatrical (and you were never left in any doubt about what the whole purpose of the ceremony was), but I'm sure they could learn a thing or two from Lord Andrew!
Alan Henness

There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:

1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?

konnor
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#187 Post by konnor » June 20th, 2009, 5:17 pm

I would attend any time I'm invited. Sometimes it's nice just to catchup with friends, even if it does mean enduring 2 hours of worship and sermon.

If I didn't snoore I could get a nice hours shut eye. Looking around I think many others are the same..

Hippolyta
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#188 Post by Hippolyta » August 27th, 2009, 9:26 am

I enjoy going to churches, and other various places of worship as a learning experience...
I enjoy learning about what various religions believe. I also think I can learn a great deal about the culture from which the religion originated. Most are welcoming to visitors, if I don't like the atmosphere I simply don't go back.

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jaywhat
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#189 Post by jaywhat » August 27th, 2009, 4:53 pm

Can't remember what I voted but I do not go at all - except when I really have to, BUT recently we may have been seen coming out of the parish church crypt in Huddersfield where there is decent restaurant called The Keys.
I told my mother we went there and did not say grace, just to wind her up. She's not a bad old sod - sent me £100 for my birthday the other day - and I'm 72 !

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Alan H
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#190 Post by Alan H » August 27th, 2009, 5:07 pm

jaywhat wrote:She's not a bad old sod - sent me £100 for my birthday the other day - and I'm 72 !
You're probably still her 'little boy'!
Alan Henness

There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:

1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?

Hippolyta
Posts: 12
Joined: August 27th, 2009, 6:56 am

Re: Do you ever go to church?

#191 Post by Hippolyta » August 28th, 2009, 1:50 am

jaywhat wrote:Can't remember what I voted but I do not go at all - except when I really have to, BUT recently we may have been seen coming out of the parish church crypt in Huddersfield where there is decent restaurant called The Keys.
I told my mother we went there and did not say grace, just to wind her up. She's not a bad old sod - sent me £100 for my birthday the other day - and I'm 72 !
The one you voted for will have a little x beside it, all the way to the right, right next to the number of people who voted :)

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jaywhat
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#192 Post by jaywhat » August 28th, 2009, 7:31 am

Yes, I know it normally does that, Hip, but not this time.

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Alan H
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#193 Post by Alan H » August 28th, 2009, 9:57 am

As Hippolyta says, there should be an x...can't think why you wouldn't see it.
Alan Henness

There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:

1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?

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jaywhat
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#194 Post by jaywhat » August 28th, 2009, 11:51 am

Well it aint there. Either I did not vote or it just aint there - but if I didn't vote can I not now or is the voting over - I know its been up a long time?

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SoldierForTruth
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#195 Post by SoldierForTruth » August 28th, 2009, 5:43 pm

I'm currently staying in a Christian Mission for the homeless. Normally, I wouldn't mind it one bit, but the people who work there appear more concerned with having control over a number of people than truly caring and helping those in need. Not all of them mind you, just the majority. Not to mention the fact that there's a mandatory service before every meal.
"Loyalty to tradition is not enough. You've got to keep asking yourself: What if I'm wrong?"
-Daniel C. Dennett

Maria Mac
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#196 Post by Maria Mac » August 28th, 2009, 6:07 pm

jaywhat wrote:Well it aint there. Either I did not vote or it just aint there - but if I didn't vote can I not now or is the voting over - I know its been up a long time?
This poll is never closed so see if you can vote. If you can, it would suggest that you never voted before. If you can't, it would seem that you did and for some reason the cross has disappeared.

Maria Mac
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#197 Post by Maria Mac » August 28th, 2009, 6:09 pm

SoldierForTruth wrote:I'm currently staying in a Christian Mission for the homeless.
That sounds like double hardship: the fact that youre homeless is bad enough but having to stay in a Christian Mission sounds awful.

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SoldierForTruth
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#198 Post by SoldierForTruth » August 28th, 2009, 9:47 pm

Maria wrote:
SoldierForTruth wrote:I'm currently staying in a Christian Mission for the homeless.
That sounds like double hardship: the fact that youre homeless is bad enough but having to stay in a Christian Mission sounds awful.
You know, it's not so bad being homeless. Very humbling. I feel quite free. I have all the time in the world, so I just hang out at the library doing research for no other reason than to learn something new everyday. The Mission's not too bad, but I wish they'd treat us like decent human beings and that they wouldn't insist on forcing their superstitions on the unwilling.

I'm really at a remarkable point in my life. At 23, I've been through more life experiences than many people twice my age. Just to name a few: marriage, war, and financial straits. All things considered, I'm very happy. I'm reminded of a quote I picked up a while back from Edward P. Morgan: "The one thing that really matters is to be bigger than the things that happen to you. Nothing that can happen to you is half so important as the way in which you meet it."
"Loyalty to tradition is not enough. You've got to keep asking yourself: What if I'm wrong?"
-Daniel C. Dennett

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getreal
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#199 Post by getreal » August 29th, 2009, 12:03 am

Edward P. Morgan: "The one thing that really matters is to be bigger than the things that happen to you. Nothing that can happen to you is half so important as the way in which you meet it."
I like that SfT. I find it facinating that some people feel very hard done to, yet have had few difficulties in their life and vice versa. It's most definatly an attitude thang!

Churches. Whenever I'm abroad I like to visit churches. I too, find it helps to understand the culture better (although that would depend on the countryt. I don't know if visiting a church in Australia would necessarily tell you anything about Aussies).
Generally speaking they also are inclined to be pretty nice buildings.

Though my husband and I had a bit of a narrow escape whe we visited the buddhist temple at Eskdalemuir; and let me tell you now, those prayer flags look really miserable hanging limply in the scottish rain and monks/nuns lose some of that romanticism they seem to have in Asia, when they are flip flopping through the puddles in scotland.

But that's a loooong story for a cold winter's night.
"It's hard to put a leash on a dog once you've put a crown on his head"-Tyrion Lannister.

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Lorikeet
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#200 Post by Lorikeet » August 31st, 2009, 4:05 pm

Wow - good for you SfT - you are clearly making the most of things!

I'm being dragged to church quite a lot by my beloved at present. I refuse to take communion or to try to look as if I'm praying - I just keep a polite expression on, or try to. I sing the hymns if I like and can get the tune, though I make up some of my own words sometimes (I got into a bit of trouble after a Lord's Prayer once, though, in which I said "Lead us not into temptation; I can find the way myself" and he heard me). I'm happy to go for friends' sake, and have no problem going to funerals or weddings. Never been invited to a christening, but I expect I'd go.

What I don't like is that having gone along to be nice and supportive, it's now being received as a matter of course rather than as a special privilege and I think the time has come to see what happens if I refuse to go.
All humans are brothers. We came from the same supernova.

Ron Webb
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Re: Do you ever go to church?

#201 Post by Ron Webb » September 2nd, 2009, 12:40 pm

Lorikeet, if there are humanist meetings or events in your area, maybe you should invite your beloved to accompany you to them. If not, in exchange for your continued attendance at his church, you could ask him to read a book that explains your beliefs or lack thereof, and discuss it with you. Anything for balance.

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