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Enter here for humour and irreverence.
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#241
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by Alan H » December 29th, 2014, 2:23 pm
Latest post of the previous page:
David Cameron Lifesize Cardboard Cutout Standee
Read the customer reviews...
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Dave B
- Posts: 17809
- Joined: May 17th, 2010, 9:15 pm
#242
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by Dave B » December 29th, 2014, 3:37 pm
Brilliant, just the thing for target practice!
Cover it in cling film then use a paintball gun.
"Look forward; yesterday was a lesson, if you did not learn from it you wasted it."
Me, 2015
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#243
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by Alan H » January 25th, 2015, 2:58 pm
Nation’s Historians Warn The Past Is Expanding At Alarming Rate“It’s shocking to contemplate, but in the relatively short stretch since 1984, when I first began tracking its growth, the past has expanded by more than 30 years,” he added.
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Dave B
- Posts: 17809
- Joined: May 17th, 2010, 9:15 pm
#244
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by Dave B » January 25th, 2015, 4:27 pm
I like it!
Problem is our personal futures diminish at the same rate - oh, gloom!
"Look forward; yesterday was a lesson, if you did not learn from it you wasted it."
Me, 2015
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#245
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by Alan H » January 25th, 2015, 5:54 pm
Dave B wrote:I like it!
Problem is our personal futures diminish at the same rate - oh, gloom!
OMG! I never thought of that!
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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thundril
- Posts: 3607
- Joined: July 4th, 2008, 5:02 pm
#246
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by thundril » January 26th, 2015, 11:24 pm
No they don't! The past, being global, expands at an exponential rate; but your future, being personal, contracts at a linear rate.
Fear not. It's all manageable!
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Dave B
- Posts: 17809
- Joined: May 17th, 2010, 9:15 pm
#247
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by Dave B » January 27th, 2015, 10:39 am
thundril wrote:No they don't! The past, being global, expands at an exponential rate; but your future, being personal, contracts at a linear rate.
Fear not. It's all manageable!
Good thinking, thunders!
"Look forward; yesterday was a lesson, if you did not learn from it you wasted it."
Me, 2015
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#249
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by Alan H » March 26th, 2016, 12:41 pm
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Dave B
- Posts: 17809
- Joined: May 17th, 2010, 9:15 pm
#250
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by Dave B » March 26th, 2016, 1:08 pm
They have just come to the conclusion that there are total idiots on social media (well, everywhere on tge web I suppose)!?
Thought that was obvious from any casual cruise through these "services". Pity though, they still have the potential to be useful. I got fed up with the constant false invites to be a friend and otger spam promotions etc.
"Look forward; yesterday was a lesson, if you did not learn from it you wasted it."
Me, 2015
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#251
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by Alan H » March 26th, 2016, 8:02 pm
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Dave B
- Posts: 17809
- Joined: May 17th, 2010, 9:15 pm
#252
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by Dave B » March 26th, 2016, 8:29 pm
"Look forward; yesterday was a lesson, if you did not learn from it you wasted it."
Me, 2015
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#254
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by Alan H » November 30th, 2016, 1:29 pm
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Tetenterre
- Posts: 3244
- Joined: March 13th, 2011, 11:36 am
#255
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by Tetenterre » November 30th, 2016, 3:49 pm
^
^
Steve
Quantum Theory: The branch of science with which people who know absolutely sod all about quantum theory can explain anything.
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#256
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by Alan H » December 16th, 2016, 1:46 pm
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#257
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by Alan H » December 19th, 2016, 12:00 am
Don't know where this fits, but it's a story told by David Niven about Douglas Bader, the WWII fighter pilot:
- 2016-12-18_23h53_30.png (279.2 KiB) Viewed 43104 times
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?
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Tetenterre
- Posts: 3244
- Joined: March 13th, 2011, 11:36 am
#258
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by Tetenterre » December 19th, 2016, 12:49 pm
Given Bader's notoriously strong "Victorian values" stance, I suspect that may be apocryphal; it's a joke I first heard at least 50 years ago, with the pilot being one of the RAF Polish squadron. See, for example,
http://www.circlecity.co.uk/text_jokes/ ... -pilot.php
Steve
Quantum Theory: The branch of science with which people who know absolutely sod all about quantum theory can explain anything.
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Alan H
- Posts: 24067
- Joined: July 3rd, 2007, 10:26 pm
#259
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by Alan H » January 5th, 2017, 11:58 pm
It'd be a joke if it wasn't so serious:
ISIS pledge to kill thousands of Americans by opening gun stores across the MidwestNotorious Islamic terror group ISIS have announced a plan to kill thousands of Americans by opening gun stores across the midwest and selling firearms at discount prices.
With an evil cackle, Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi told jubilant supporters this plan would result in the deaths of untold thousands of Americans every year.
The stores will offer discounts of up to 10%, with a guarantee to beat the price of any gun sold at competing vendors and loyalty cards offered to anyone buying more than two firearms a year.
Free bullets will be included in the cost of any sale of $200 or more.
The stores will also offer expert tuition in shooting in on-site firing ranges to help ensure their customers never miss.
It is intended the new retail chain will be called ‘All-American Patriot’, and will have an extensive section devoted to easily concealed high calibre weapons with extended magazines.
“In the name of Allah, the great, the merciful, we will sell Americans high-quality guns at low, low prices”, Al-Baghdadi promised the cheering crowd.
“Our prices will be so low you’ll think we’re craaaaaazy!”
“With a 5-year warranty and money-back guarantee if anyone shot by one of our guns survives, our rifles, shotguns and pistols will be ideal for firing at other Americans which will save us the trouble.”
“They will fall upon each other like the whirlwind, like dogs, smiting each other down, praise be to God.”
“More than they are already are, that is,” he added.
The National Rifle Association both welcomed and condemned the plans, saying that it was a God-given right to sell guns to Americans but they’d rather people weren’t so blatant about the consequences, thanks very much.
If the plan is successful, ISIS plan to extend their reign of terror and death by opening MacDonald’s franchises and cutting the price of supersized meals.
Alan Henness
There are three fundamental questions for anyone advocating Brexit:
1. What, precisely, are the significant and tangible benefits of leaving the EU?
2. What damage to the UK and its citizens is an acceptable price to pay for those benefits?
3. Which ruling of the ECJ is most persuasive of the need to leave its jurisdiction?