Father Christmas

[wizzy]

Do you think it's ethical to tell children there is a man who flies in a sleigh delivering presents? I think it's a bit dodgy, but then I probably was glad to believe as a child, nice idea, plus not having Father Christmas would have made me different. Also it's a useful learning tool, if adults all conspire to make you believe in one mythical "father" it just makes you more critical of other collective lies, and it's a good way of knowing your parents don't always tell the truth.

By the way, a colleague of mine who's Slovakian (and Catholic) told me that children in Slovakia are told that Baby Jesus brings presents. I did ask if it didn't make people question religion after they learn that that story about Jesus was a lie, but she said no one really thought about it like that.

[Maria Mac]

I have a feeling I've said something about this before.....ah! here it is:

It can be a problem because you're under so much pressure to go along with the Santa Claus story. On the other hand, if you're trying to raise your children to be honest and truthful, what kind of example are you setting them?

I found myself unable to resist the pressure (from the extended family, other parents, playgroup and even school) to go along with the lie. I justified it to myself by remembering how much I enjoyed the fantasy and only felt guilty when my son came home from school saying he'd been told by a classmate that the whole Santa thing was BS. I knew this child's father was in prison and her mother was struggling with three little ones so I totally understood why this mother had to tell her kids the reason why they didn't get such expensive xmas presents as their friends.

[gcb01]

This has led to disputes between my wife (what harm can it do?) and myself (when do you stop lying to them?). I had a policy of answering questions truthfully and now prompt them, e.g. "what makes you think there is a Santa?".

The tooth fairy is a similar problem as there is a financial incentive to believe (with Santa the lure of presents is the incentive).

I don't see how it can be anything other than hypocritical to argue against children being indoctrinated with one form of mythology but try to convince them of the truth of other forms of mythology.

[Lifelinking]

Context matters surely.

From what I can remember as a small child, I never thought 'what rotten hypocrytical lying bastards'.

I thought, 'wow, the family kept that ruse going for me. They were trying to make things jolly, to have some fun.


Playing Devil's Advocate for a moment - are we not in danger of being rather 'po faced' here?

[Nick]

I remember answering this somewhere else, but can't find it offhand, so a brief recap.

In a previous life (as it were) I was a would-be father to a little lad of 4. I was not prepared to tell him lies, but could think of no reason why he should be denied prezzies. He got his pillowcaseful, but I did not say it came from Santa, I just said "Wow what a surprise!" and "Must mean you're a special little man". Of course he never asked, but had he queried Santa, I'd have said something like "Some people say there is a Santa, but it's all a bit puzzling, isn't it?" I would not have told him straight-out that Santa didn't exist. At that age, a lad is unlikely to stump you with a Paxman question. I was much more concerned that he liked his train-set!

[ColinAngusMackay]

I thought, 'wow, the family kept that ruse going for me. They were trying to make things jolly, to have some fun.

For some odd reason my mother continued to put "From Santa" on my gifts well into my 20s. I've no idea why. But, it did make things more fun.

[Maria Mac]

I thought, 'wow, the family kept that ruse going for me. They were trying to make things jolly, to have some fun.

For some odd reason my mother continued to put "From Santa" on my gifts well into my 20s. I've no idea why. But, it did make things more fun.

Wow! I had a big problem with Santa getting the credit for the wonderful presents I had chosen and bought. Santa only gave little unimportant presents in our house.